the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
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