I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Randomize
