There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Randomize
