Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
If I die, sorry about rent.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
