You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
you inspire me to be a worse person
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Randomize
