is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
