I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize