I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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