You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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