So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
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Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
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I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....