I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home