We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
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i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
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And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
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