Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
