we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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