Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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