Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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