people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Randomize
