I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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