you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
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How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
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I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
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