I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
