I want to have your abortion
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
