ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Randomize