And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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