I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Randomize