her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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