remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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