; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
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maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
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