dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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