lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
