Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize
