Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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