no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
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It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
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The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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