Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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