i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
