Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize