You're completely useless in the revolution.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
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