Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
So many bounce houses so little time
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
