Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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