Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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