11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize