So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Alive.
So much puke
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Randomize
