In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize