brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize