Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
is that a dick in a sweater?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
