WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
