I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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