I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
