how do flat chested girls get laid?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
