Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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