a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
