Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
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