if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
